Nadine's concert report
Written By
Nadine 中文翻译
By Mini
If I didn’t take the September SMAP concert adventure,
2006 would be an awful year to me, the worst I had ever experienced. But now
with the sparkling memories bearing in mind, it’s turning dear to me. God compensated
me for all my sufferings in such an incredible healing way.
Looking back to the 6 days, I find my memory is in pieces and I can hardly link
them together, a bit here, a fragment there, pluck at the edge of my mind. I’ll
just write down what my eyes and mind-eye captured, those shinning patches in
my heart. It’s so bad that I can share it with nobody in my family for the
time being, but at least I can share with all the dear Takuya fans. And someday,
I will show my children the world formed by these patches, tell them the story
of my bold gamble and well-won, and to demonstrate them how beautiful a life
could be. Sorry Mini, I can only write in English as the “Nazi man” has been
watching me all the time since I returned. I believe you will work out a much
more lustrous Chinese version. ?
***************
I had weighed a thousand times between going and not-going in my heart since
the concerts schedule was released. I told myself again and again that my family
plan was above everything. But the more I thought about it, the more I truly
wanted to see him. I didn’t set my mind for the trip until my family plan was
forced to be postponed by an unexpected office reconstruction in August. I regarded
it as providence. It was all of a sudden that something within me was awakened,
and nothing could stop it. It left me the only way to choose, I would rather
leave behind my name and anything for it. I promptly started financing and other
preparations for the trip in secret, like last year.
As the other JMs said, road of pursuing true love never runs smoothly. We met
endless problems in every step we paved. (Here passes over one million words
of introduction on the bloody tribulations we had?) Thanks to the tremendous
efforts contributed by Sibi, Agatha and Qianli on the tickets biddings and vast
communications, thanks to Martin’s persistence and dedication, thanks to Nadine’s
talent of underwork ;), we finally overcame all the obstacles and made it happen.
The first breath of Osaka was warm and fresh. It was the second time for all
five of us visiting Japan, but Osaka was new to us. The time we spent on the
way from Kansai Airport to the hotel was much longer than we expected. When
we got to the Toyoko Inn of Osaka Senba, it was night. Martin’s college-mate
was waiting for us at the reception with his nice and shy smile and with our
invaluable concerts tickets.
McDonald was the only option we had for dinner at such late hour. The hamburger
was unexpected delicious, I ate my order up in 5 minutes and helped myself on
Sibi’s french fries. (universe stomach is hard to fill) One the way back to
hotel after the quick meal, we found Takuya’s picture, actually a group picture
with an elder posted on a vendor machine of 100 meters’ distance from the hotel,
it was the advertisement for Georgia coffee. We were quite excited by finding
his first exposure at the first night of our arrival.
Back to the tiny little hotel room, we drew tickets and briefly discussed the
tour and shopping plans for the next few days.
September 20, the sun was well up in the sky when I awoke. Sun goes up meant
less to me. But that day was different, for I would see my star. The thought
made me hectic.
We spent the whole morning shopping in Shinsaibashi and pushed forward to Osaka
Dome to buy the concert goods in the early afternoon. Although it was early,
the queue to the goods court was already long enough. Pressing my way from one
stand to another, I started to catch some sense about the concert, and I became
nervous.
When I got to my seat at the back row of the second stand layer, the demo was
still half empty. There was one and half hour to go. I changed my high heel
shoes on, adjusted the telescope zoom, took out the 3D glasses fetched as the
entrance and did every other preparation I could think of.
The main stage was decorated with huge green vines, like a virgin jungle. I
was a good day-dreamer, picture of jungle always brought me reverie. Having
nothing to do, I formed a scenario in my head.- It was a primitive tribe, he
was the chief, the only one who could ever be, the man of prideful bravery.
The proud chief saved people’s lives from the mouths and claws of giant wild
monsters. He waved his spear, swept fear and despair away from people’s hearts.
He was the god of the jungle and ready to bear the honor. New life rioted across
the land, just for him.
Martin arrived, she drew my thought back from my day dream. We prepared the
fans, boards, telescopes, and put them on the easily-be-reached place in front
of us. It was getting more and more tense with every passing moment. The dome
was full.
Finally, the starting 3D video was played on the screens. Five naked baby boys
were talking to each others in SMAP voices. They played and talked in the jungle.
Suddenly they stood up and started to run, seemed being chased by wild animals.
The boys grew up gradually while they were running, and soon turned to figures
of young men. Takuya’s face rose, long hair fluttered back, it was the look
of his fierce and aggressive identity. He grabbed a red cloak and wrapped over
his shoulders. There was an exclamation of cheer burst from the spectators along
with his appearance. The video on the screen faded, smoke was emitted in the
central stage, then SMAP in red cloaks came down from the air. They were as
handsome and lovely as ever.
Takuya was on the rightmost position, with his arms stretching, he held it in
a way that was uniquely his own – really like a chief. A look of assurance
and calmness was in his eyes, his delicate face flashed of unreasoning light.
I dwelt in a world where past, present and future were melded into a single
now. His face and the image of the chief of jungle tribe in my mind lapped over
each other. Takuya chief appeared like a slash of skyfire, a burning phoenix
against clouds and mist. He made a power within me awake, the power slept until
I knew him. I thought I had forgotten the feel and smell of it, but I was wrong.
At the moment I saw him sliding down in the air, there’s a silent thunder strike
in my mind. For days I had been pursuing nothing more substantial than such
a feeling. My power revived.
*I have to make myself a cup of chocolate now. I feel I’m used up on the above
recollection. The chief left a wound in my heart, it appears the wound of that
first memory has never healed in me, it hurts from time to time, even at now.*
Taste of tears salted in my mouth. The day-dream dissolved around me and I woke
in reality. I found they had reached the stage and was singing “dear woman”,
the red cloaks were already taken off. I focused my mind again to watch his
good looking features, every movement he made, and then extended to include
the fit dark-red suit and the long black fur around his neck.
The man on the stage was flawless and perfect, retained of his extraordinary
beauty that surpassed my imagination. He shed sparks behind him and seemed to
tumble through the whole dome. I could hardly breathe or took my eyes away.
We journeyed to the limit of our marching range into unfamiliar territory just
to see him, I myself could not explain the motive before. But at the sight of
him, I knew everything we did for him was worthy, without need of reasons. I
was content with the present existence that felt like forever.
During the “bang, bang, bang” song, Takuya leaned his head over Shingo’s
shoulder, long hair ruffled, eyes gleaming, then he planted a quick kiss on
Shingo’s face. Screams burst out from the spectators.
He straightened, smiled, and crooked his head to one side, his hair fell around
his shoulder, peerlessly beautiful. He was brighter than anyone I’d seen before.
I wonder what substances made this man. The youngster idols tried to copy dress,
motions, expressions from him, but there are something only belong to himself
which could not be inherited by any others.
The 3D video was on again, the funny animals one. A lion was in Takuya’s voice
that made me thinking of the chief imagination again for a few seconds.
SMAP came back to the stage, clothes changes. He was in a short blue lattice
shirt of three-quarter sleeves, the write t-shirt with green image design could
be seen under hemline band of the outer shirt. And he was wearing a wide olive-drab
pantalettes with big yellow flowers embroidered. Like Qianli mentioned in her
report, the dress itself was too ordinary, but he made it fascinating.
The curly soft hair fell to his shoulders and framed his delicate face with
finer features, it was a young man’s most striking feature. The beauty could
never belong to anyone but him. There was a crushing weight on my chest. I planned
to act with as much grace as I could muster, but when I saw him, I was in half
crazy condition.
In the MC part, SMAP stood in the front of the main stage and started to talk.
It’s a pity that I could not understand a single word, but it was a good time
for me to have a better look at him. He was standing akimbo next to Shingo,
his sweaty face remained its delicate beauty, he listened to the others’ talks
at first, with a vague smile. He raised one hand rubbing his head and the soft
long hair. Later, he jointed the talk, it seemed they were making joke on each
other, a burst of laughter exploded from his throat and he stood with his arms
locked together. I was totally lost in his smiles.
After the MC, they stepped upstairs to the back far-end of the stage and seated
back-to-back there. The place where they were sitting began to rotate while
they were singing. As Takuya was at the rightmost position, he would be the
last one turning to face the front. I discussed with Martin and we both believed
that it would be a good timing to show up boards of his name.
I couldn’t remember the order of the songs, at that time, the only thing I
could do was stared fixedly at him through the telescope.
It came the 3D video. Takuya boxer was knocked out, and fell toward the screen.
As I was all the time putting on the telescope on top of the glasses, he seemed
so close, I thought I could touch him if I reached out my hand. Then the cracking
eyes popped up and made me laughed.
They changed clothes again, the legendary long black suits appeared, white shirt
and a shining belt. They dropped to one knee and held the pose for a while,
I noticed the suit was translucent. Under the cover of the black long dress,
Takuya’s body seemed thinner than he actually was. His hair fluttered along
with his dancing steps. The movement was as natural and easy as breath to him,
he was far stronger than he looked. The air around him seemed grow warmer. Through
the telescope, I could even felt his hot breath and pounding of his heart.
The SMAP dance show was one of the highlights of the concert, the members played
solo shows and assembled to dance in pairs and triangles. Sexy Takuya solo dance
set afire in the dome and arose many shrill cries.
The two tops paired, Nakai in front, Takuya at back, they played a snip of “thousand-hand-Guanyin”.
Then Takuya slid to the right side of Nakai, and started with a very difficult
breaking dance. I had watched Takuya played electric, trubo, poping, locking,
water-wave, robot and all other sort of hip-hops at the DVDs of his previous
performances. It was the first time I saw him played breaking. A beautiful top
rock followed by an airswipe (I couldn’t remember very well what it exactly
was, somebody said it was a windmill, but it’s more like a helicopter or airswipe
to me). *Breaking is much more difficult than the normal hip hop dances, it
requires the dancer have great strength, high body-flexibility and harmonization.*
He kipped-up and got back to his feet. He was radiant with strength. His hair
fell across his face and he shook them away. I had expected anything but this
– the chief’s own battle. He always brought us surprises, It was because of
the thousands of pairs of eyes that watched him with bright, adoring, admiration
looks that he would keep going. Thanks to the special nerves he possessed and
the extreme effort he paid, he never failed. *Afterwards, Sibi told us that
Nakai said in the magazine that because he injured and couldn’t dance, Takuya’d
got to do the leader’s share. It was also the first time for Nakai to see Takuya’s
breaking dance. That's his method to show Nakai and the fans his love.*
The following 3D video led to a snowing scene. Big flakes of snow were falling
on the stage by the time he appeared again. The fourth set of clothes was a
fit cyan suit. He sat on the rightmost spot on the stage stair while others
were singing. I watched him, seeing a dreaming look in his face and eyes. The
eyes were deep and light as mist. He sat there turned his face upward, and then
drew a deep breath and closed his eyes. The quiet Takuya was childlike, he sheltered
the blaze and emitted a special boyish mysterious. He reopened his eyes, looked
down for a moment and when he raised head again, a thin smile passed over his
lips.
The 3D video was on again. Takuya shown on the screen was wearing a nobler white
shirt, the Hikaru style, he scooped an armful of air in front of him and made
a kiss posture, the air turned to dozens of pink hearts flew toward us. I reached
out my hands for the hearts.
*I have to eat something again before starting with the solo part, my brain
capability has reached its limit.*
Shingo’s solo was the first one. It was fierce and energetic. The former half-grown
baby brother in SMAP had completely become man. Goro’s solo followed was more
like a small amusing magic show, he remained the unique prince manner. I noticed
that there were stand-ins for him but it was only in the last day when I was
close enough to see.
Shingo came back to the stage again. Takuya was playing guitar behind him and
sang the harmonic part. He was in orange sweater and white tore jeans. He totally
immersed himself in the song, the big eyes were more luminous. Shingo and Takuya’s
voices matched each other very well, the former was vigorous and resonant, the
latter was melodious and sonorous. Guys, well done! *Martin, the slow songs
were my favorite too. I noticed the tears in you face at that moment, it was
so nice to be with you, to share the same views and feelings with you.*
Tsuyoshi’s agitative solo made the whole dome high, people waved the hand-lamps
and sang with him.
A spark of light lingered around Takuya while he soloed. His eyes went more
brilliant in the focused stage light. The sounds came to me far away, as if
from another world. No one could sing his song as he did. He seemed lost in
his own world when he sang. I wondered what that world was like. I found his
heart in his voice, his self opened like a night-blooming flower, his soul naked
like a lost child. His voice echoed in the dome, in the beginning it was like
a brooklet, and later, it merged with a larger swift-flowing stream. I heard,
drifting my soul from the upstream to the downstream of his voice, navigated
by him. There were two defects in the high tone, but it did not impact at all,
for the first time, his solo touched my spirit. It was like, I couldn’t find
any words to describe my feeling, it was like - seventeenth years old and never
been kissed. “Takuya”, I cried, I was pulling the words out of my heart. In
the following days, his solo was better and better, but the first not-so-perfect
one touched me the most.
It was no more real than a dream. And it was getting more real every moment.
I tasted my tears again.
When SMAP reappeared, they changed garments again. It was a bit like army uniform
- white shirt, olive green casual suit coat, fit camouflage trousers and black
leather boots. Takuya wore a pair of black sunglasses, looked like an avion
pilot. He threw off the sunglasses and started to dash free and wild on the
stage, like an arrow in fight. Strength beauty and dainty beauty made him so
different, both bloods run equally in his veins. His is a man people turned
to him for his strength and intensity, and at the meanwhile for his amazing
beauty.
The lucky-sans were lotted and invited to the back stage, among them there was
a little boy about 5 years old. After greeted to all the lucky-sans, Takuya
stooped down, reached out hands to the young boy, and lifted the boy up to sit
on his neck, his smile was broaden. He carried the boy moved around the back
stages. I noticed that he put one of his hands to protect the boy from falling
from the beginning to the end. It was a loving scene of “father and son”.
During the Hana song at the back stage, I could clearly catch up the pure sincerity
in his eyes. He smacked a fist against his chest, it made me tearing. I had
a sudden feeling that I had known him almost as long as I’d known myself. It’s
not a moment’s passion, but long-suffering love. I saw it in the dreams, I
tried to find it, but I knew at that time that it would take longer than I had
given it.
I looked at him as hard as I could during the whole concert. Sometimes, the
lighting scaffold blocked my sight and he was barely visible from my point,
but I still tried to search for the corner of his clothes or view of his back.
When he disappeared into the darkness, I just adjusted my night eyes to the
beamless dark and I tried to fix his location in the darkness and recognize
his shadow. I was locking stares and minds with him. *I really feel sorry to
the other SMAP members that I couldn’t share attention to them in the dome.
I promise I will look at you more carefully one by one when I buy the concert
DVD.*
Takuya’s eyes growing brighter as the fireworks blasted off. In the depths
of his crystal-like eyes, everyone could easily become lost. My soul left my
body and danced with the fireworks.
The dancers teamed up, the whole crew standing side-by-side and holding hands.
With a triumphant grin covered his face, Takuya and other members bowed to salute
in all directions. I could feel a wave of gratitude. The fans cheered with screams
and called their names. He was very delighted by the spectators’ enthusiasm.
His smile was like a morning sunflower.
Encore started, he returned, sweating greatly, but laughing so joyfully, obviously
pleased with today’s event and performance. He shook his head and long hair
in great happiness, it was unworldly beautiful, which made him seemed more like
an angel in fairy tale than a human creature. It was several long moments before
I could breathe again.
After the encore, SMAP moving out of the sight at the end of the main stage.
Fist clenched and raised up, he glanced back over his shoulder. That’s the
last look of him at that night.
We five girls met each other out of the dome. My sweat dried in the thin night
breeze, but my heart still beat loud in my ears. A few stars sparkled in the
dark night sky beyond. None of us had yet chosen to talk about it, but everyone
thought about it.
We followed the fans stream and took subway back to hotel. The mind was turned
on our empty stomach. We discussed what to eat while we talked and were brightened
to the thought of being warm and filled. We finally found a restaurant near
the hotel serving beef-rice and pork-rice set food. My mouth was filled with
the taste of the beef. Talking about the planning with the other girls for the
second day, I felt it was the best meal I’d ever had.
Back to the hotel room, lying on my back, stretching out on the bed, his movement
flashing brilliantly in my mind. I could not sleep at all. I drew open the curtain
and looked out. It was a perfect place for stargazing. Looked up into the starring
sky, his face flashing in the universe, I felt an odd pain in my heart. I laid
back and let the tears slipped free. “Qianli, my dear, sorry for disturbing
you by long weeping. I really couldn’t control my prolonged emotional flood
at that night.”
I woke up in the next morning. I had to cool myself down before I could recapture
the emotions of the near past. My body still ached with exhaustion. I felt a
strange sense of loss, as if my memory had gone empty. I tried to recall the
details of last night, but all that emerged was his face printed in the fan.
After breakfast, we went to Osaka City. It was a pleasant trip. *Sibi, your
standard SMAP-fan uniform was so cool! If I were 20kgs slimmer, I would have
done the same and formed a group with you.”
In the early afternoon Agatha and I went to do window shopping for cooking equipment.
I feasted my eyes greatly on the handy kitchen things. *Agatha, thank you for
protecting my purse and cooling my feverish head down. You are the best shopping
partner in the world.”
I took my seat in the dome about the same time as the day before. And it was
a few rows nearer and on the right side from the previous seat. It was still
Martin-Nadine combination?. My “not-quite-here” condition was changed a little,
I managed to spend less time on daydreams and more time on crying his name.
There was one thing I saw at that very night, maybe it was only my hallucination
but it for a long time made my world shrank to my immediate perceptions. I can
still recall the vivid exultation it took me.
During the turned-stage star song, Martin and I help up the boards of his name,
to show him our support. Of course we were hoping that for once he might have
seen. Takuya’s seat turned to face the spectators, his large and luminous eyes
flickered and took several heartbeats to focus on our direction. He faced our
direction with locking eyes, the heartbreaking eyes. A sight of something made
his eyes went wider. Was it the boards of his name attracted his attention?
the idea made my heart racing in my chest. He gestured with a nod of his head,
and made a half-fist in front of his eyes and turned it as if communicating
something. A big smile on his face. I was thrown completely off balance by the
shocking scene captured by my eyes. Things were happening too fast. I was only
half-believing what was happening. And later, my brain and mind was host to
memories of that moment. Though my wiser self told me it would hardly be real
cause we were too far from his sight, I still trust my memories and lung to
the belief that he somehow saw the boards. I was more than a little crazy.
Excitement racing along my nerves, I elbowed Martin and told her about my findings.
She burst into a cheer and asked when it happened. As much to clarify things
in my own mind as to answer her query, I said “A few seconds ago” and I interpreted
the gestures from my understanding “he nodded to tell us he saw the boards
and the fist-turned motive he was saying ‘you are taking telescopes’. Martijn
gave another burst of cheer. Later that night, the JMs told me that it was an
invisible distance from the stage to the points we were sitting, even for eagle-eyed
man. Maybe someone sitting in the close-enough lucky seat of the same direction
was holding his name and watching him through telescope and got his reaction.
It challenged my confidence somehow, but I would rather believe my imagination
for it was the best feeling there was.
I cried his name many times that night together with other local fans, and I
really delighted in calling him. “Be quite and good” was concept-rooted at
my mind for several years, but when facing him, it was overturned. He wore irrevocable
change on me.
September 22, another warm day came. It was a harvest day - we had a luxurious
BBQ lunch with Qianli’s lovely friend, we bought gifts for families at shops
in Nihonbashi, I got Edward and Alphonse’s figure-models at a reasonable price….
In the afternoon, we went back to the familiar place. This time Sibi, Martin
and I sat together, we formed a bigger team.
The MC part took a greater lengths of time than the last two days. Shingo’s
microphone was dumb for a while, Takuya approached him to check…. Although
there’s nothing more special, I enjoyed it very much. The first two days I
felt like an onlooker, the third day when I saw him, I did felt like I was part
of this world. The hours went by and I even didn’t notice. His each smile filled
me with a pure and innocent joy.
We planned to get up earlier to go to Nara or Kobe for a tour. But having too
many choices was the same as having no choice at all. When our “strategy”
for the last concert was decided, we aware that we were out of options, but
be well prepared for the concert.
Saturday morning, Qianli and I set off for the nearest100-yen shop to purchase
decoration materials. We were very efficient, everything we needed was found
within two hours and we had more stuff ready for more creativity. We rushed
back to the hotel and started for handcrafts together with Sibi and Agatha.
We completed the mission just on time.
Knowing that it would be for the last chance seeing him this time, I regarded
it my battleground and put together all my courage. I took Mini’s suggestion
wore a little-sexy bodice and a blouse, and put on my high heel shoes in a inspiring
way as if fighting my most difficult battle.
The 4 of us would have a big fun together in the evening, in arena D7.
When we entered into the dome and found the seats, we immediately started to
make up ourselves. It was simple but striking – we put three green fluorescence
bars around the left wrists and a big red flower on the hair – dear women look.
The fans were all edged with red and golden rainbow band.
Two young Japanese girls wearing green t-shirt, green flower, mini skirt, and
holding green sign boards of Takuya’s name were quite noticeable. There were
Takuya’s figure and “1113” printed on their t-shirts.
Thinking of the precious little time left, looking into his face, his delicate
features, pausing to taste the air of the dome, a curious mix of emotions was
playing subtly across. We didn’t expect marvelous luck, we just wanted to have
a good look at him. I decided to make the best use of the time to enjoy the
concert and his performance.
The view point was fantastic, I could clearly see him. I saw many details that
I had not noticed from the stand seats on the previous dates–His dance was
so powerful that could even be read from the muscles underneath the clothes;
his soft amber color hair dangling down and spread around his shoulder along
with his rhythmic movement (it was not news at all, but the closer shot really
shocked me); he leaned into Shingo’s back and blinked like a small boy; he
threw an arm over Tsuyoshi’s shoulder and made the latter bashful; there was
always reassuring sight in his eyes when he exchanged look with other members;
two dancers came up beside him, one on either side, he released a huge happy
grin; while sitting with his back against the stairs, he gazed somewhere dreamily
and mouthed some words; he wet his lips with the tip of his tongue; he was panting
and hot after the long hour of dance, he drank and poured water through his
hair, then shook off the sweats and water, like a cute puppy dog, his damp hair
stuck to his face and neck, the sweaty baby was ravishingly beautiful; after
the encore demand, he appeared again on the stage wearing a piquant and a equally
fond look; at the very end, he put his hands on Nakai’s hip and helped the
soaked and tired leader to climb up the stairs; he mouthed good-bye and thank
you, with right hand firmly and highly raised and fisted…….
God is so fond of this loving son, by giving him unconquerable strength and
the irresistible attraction, and makes him incogitable possibilities.
There were too many things to see, my unwinking eyes felt sour. The views made
my heart lift and the blood raced through my veins, it disabled my audition,
I could only heard my heart pounding in my ears. I felt myself like a moth irresistibly
flying toward the flame. I wished to make the burning moment last as long as
possible. At the moment he was out of the reach of my eyes, I hoped – almost
prayed – he would come back…… I shouted out his name again……
I asked myself what did I feel, hoping to remember the feeling forever. But
I didn’t know how to describe it to my inner self, the feeling I couldn’t
quite name. Maybe no one could put right words around what we had felt when
we saw him. Any words seem pale and faint.
The evening was close to perfect. I enjoyed immensely, never regret the efforts
I paid for the trip. I was so proud that I made this glorious moment true together
with the best partners (for local fans, it’s such easy a thing to come to see
him at this dome, but for us, it’s almost a mission impossible, so it’s indeed
a glorious moment to us.)
The night autumn air began to chill. We were so tired for we had poured all
our passion and essence into the time inside the dome, our strength was long-since
spent. Qianli and I made the last effort to go to buy more goods, but found
that Takuya’s file folders and posters had been sold out. We were disappointed,
but happy for him. The 33 years old father of two daughters is still on top
popularity.
It was cold, and our bellies were empty, our legs were deadweight. Everyone
was oppressed by a sense of loss. We decided to strive for something cheerful.
We went to feast our stomachs.
The night was sleepless. I tried to write down something but couldn’t make
a word. It was deep beyond words. The bitter days I came through had been so
terribly cruel, I almost crashed under the hardship and desperate, I was slipping
so deep into the cold lonely world, forgot what happiness was. Then, god made
a choice for me and unfroze my heart with this harvest season, by the help and
accompanies from my lovely friends. It told me life was as generous as it ever
got. It showed me the best way to confront life with hope, growth and dreamful
heart. With every sight of him I love life more. I asked myself why I follow
him, and found the answer – he is all those things I am not, and all those
things that I need.
The concert-free day eventually came. We threw ourselves into the beauty and
dew-soaked air in Kyoto for the whole day, and enjoyed two big meals.
When we got back to Osaka, it was night. The air was cool, the sky was clear,
the stars winked. We wandered aimlessly in the streets.
We went up to the huge Ferris wheel and overlooked the city. We were leaving
tomorrow morning, for suddenly it had all come clear and sharp to me. It nurtured
a strong emptiness within me. His name burst out of my thoughts. Sibi and Agatha
began to sob silently. Something ached in my heart, I pressed my cheek against
the window of the cable car and tried not to think of him. Qianli and I started
to talk jokes lightening the mood. The night wind became moist.
In the next early morning, when we pulled the heavy luggage to set off for the
subway, we passed again the vendor machine with his picture of coffee advertisement
near the hotel. A knife-thrusts of pain stroke me at the sight of his face.
The feeling spread to my belly and from there to my fingers and toes. Life is
life, it’s always the way of things, meet-apart-meet again-apart again.
Completing the above sketch made me exhausted. Maybe, it is because I’m pulling
memories out of my soul.
The bitter taste has melted in the tears and washed away, now the trip left
me an aftertaste of sweetness. Life gets no sweeter than this.
I big bag I took with me to Osaka had a mental belt, it filled with stuffs and
weighted heavily on my shoulder throughout the whole trip. I complained a lot
about it. But now, I miss the weight.
This man is a prodigy, he has the ability to bring energy and strength to everyone.
He is also a treasury of new things that can give you endless surprises. I really
enjoyed the light and warmth he gave me in the concerts. His talent made my
ordinary life a great enjoyment.
I could do nothing without the others. Thanks Tiya for lending me your telescope,
you are absolutely right, it gave me the best vision I’ve ever had. Thanks
Mini for pushing me for the report, it’s so nice to look back rediscovering
happy moments, and keep my ever-fresh sense of adventure. A few words to my
dear partners: Sib- our true leader, Agatha – our spiritual mentor, Qianli
– our good-natured angel, Martin- our heart curer, thanks for the companionship
and thanks for the best memories! I love you.
如果没有今年九月的Pop Up Smap 大阪行，2006年将会是我生命中从未经历过，最糟糕的一年。可因为有了這些留在心中闪闪发光的记忆，一切的一切，都由苦涩变为甘甜，老天用非常独特的方式补偿了我所有的磨难。
回想在大阪的六天，发现自己的记忆零碎得无法整理，這里一点那里一滴，点点滴滴环绕在心头完全无法处置，只能尽我所能写下心里眼里保存的记忆。而這些珍贵的记忆我永远无法与家人分享，让我不能不感到悲哀，但至少可以在森林里与我同样爱着他的大家分享我心中永远美好的记忆。或许，终有一天，我会把這個故事讲给我的孩子听，這些我不惜一切去争取的，几近疯狂的行为，让我神魂颠倒的记忆，一一展示出来，让他们知道，生命可以如此美好。Mini，对不起了，由于无时无刻都被南霸天监视，只能写英文版的报告了，期待你亮泽的中文版！（M按：老南，我恨你！）
自从演唱会日程出来后，我暗自在心里衡量不下千百遍，去？还是不去？一次次的告诉自己，我的家庭计划高于一切，可越是想说服自己就越想见他。直到我们公司八月要进行大装修，家庭计划被迫暂停，终于让我下了最后的决心向演唱会进发！這一切都是天意吧！就在我决定的同时，心底深处的某一个角落，那颗渴望见到他的心瞬间复活，而這样的心情一发不可收拾，没有任何东西可以阻止！這样一来，只剩下了唯一的选择，为了這個目标我会不惜一切，此时此刻，没有什么比见到他更为重要了！像去年一样，我开始了秘密准备工作。
像森林中其他姐妹说的一样，追寻真爱的过程永远不会顺利（True Love Never Runs Smoothly），整个准备过程中，每一个环节都碰到难题，而這些难题好像永远没有尽头（关于我们艰难困苦的准备过程，下面省略千万字）。感谢千里，Sibi，阿加莎为了拍票而不辞劳苦的奔波联系，感谢Martin的坚持与奉献，感谢Nadine无懈可击的地下工作：）！我们终于排除万难，成功踏上了看似永远不可能实现的旅程。
第一口呼吸到大阪的空气，是那样的温暖清新，尽管五个人都是第二次踏上日本這块土地，可是大阪对我们来说，是全新的经验，从关西机场到酒店的路程，比我们想象得要远，等我们到达酒店已经是晚上。Martin的同学早就在酒店大堂等我们，温和而腼腆的冲我们笑着，手里拿着我们价值连城的演唱会门票。由于时间太晚了，我们只能在麦当劳解决晚餐，日本的汉堡真好吃（M按，小吃货），我以五分钟不到的速度迅速吃完属于自己的套餐，然后把手伸向了Sibi的薯条--宇宙般的胃是比较难填饱的，嘻嘻。饭后在回酒店的途中，居然在百米开外的饮料机上看到拓哉的Georgia
咖啡广告，在踏上日本的初夜就能见到他，让我们着实兴奋了很久。回到酒店狭小的房间里，大家抽票然后简单的商量了接下来几天的日程。
9月20 日，当我睁开眼睛太阳已经升得老高，一想到今天能够见到思念已久的他，连每天能看见的太阳也让我兴奋莫名。
早上我们在心斋桥购物，下午早早就向会场进发，去排队买周边。别看时间尚早， 周边的人群已经排得满满，随着人群穿流在周边摊位之间，有了参与演唱会的真实感，暗暗开始紧张起来。当我坐在Dome里，属于Stand第二层后排的位置，离开场还有一个半小时，几乎还有一半的座位是空的。我换好了高跟鞋，调好望远镜，把入口处派发的3D眼镜拿出来，所有能想到的准备工作都做好以后，开始打量這次的Pop
Up 舞台。
主舞台以绿色为主，到处布满了绿色攀藤物，像个原始森林。此时离开场还有很久，无所事事而擅长幻想的我开始陷入沉思。。。。。。
在我撰写的故事里，他是一个原始部落的酋长，勇敢而坚毅，保护族人不受野兽侵害，一次次从怪兽的魔掌下，血淋淋的兽口中拯救生命，挥舞着长矛，保护族人远离恐惧与伤害。他是森林绝对的王者，受着族人敬仰与膜拜！因为有他，族群正在无限量增加，人们不远万里来到，只为一睹他迷人的风姿。。。。。。
正在我白日梦发得不亦乐乎的时候，Martin来了，把我拉回了现实。我们准备好扇子，灯牌，望远镜，放在伸手可及的地方。随着最后的准备工作，会场也渐渐的填满了观众，离开场一分分的接近，我也越来越紧张。
终于开场了！ 大屏幕上开始播3D片段，五子的声音配上赤裸的婴儿在森林里交谈玩耍，突然间婴儿站起来开始狂奔，像是被什么野兽在追赶。屏幕上的婴儿渐渐长大，很快变为成人模样，拓哉的面容出现了，长发在他脸旁飞扬，一脸的凶狠与跋扈，他抓起一件红斗篷披在身上，随着他出现的刹那，现场响起震耳的欢呼！
大屏幕淡出，舞台上放出白烟，五个人穿着红色斗篷，英伟可爱地滑向舞台。
拓哉站在最右面， 用他独特的方式一只手绕着吊杆-----真真的就是森林的王者呀！表情是那样的坚定沉着，精致的脸庞闪烁着不知从何而来，毫无来由的光芒，我的世界包括过去，现在，未来，全盘被这张脸吞噬。而这张脸与我幻想出来的森林王者互相融合，再也不能分割。看着我的拓哉酋长化身一只美丽夺目的火凤凰，如火焰滑过天空般迎着云彩翱翔；他唤醒了我深埋心底那沉睡已久，确在爱上他后完全爆发的热情。曾几何时，我以为现实的磨难已经把我所有的热情磨光，可是我错了，在他从天而降的刹那，心中如闪电划过夜空般刷的一下亮堂起来，被我忘却的能量随着他的出现，重新注入被我遗忘甚至枯竭的心灵！
所有的能量都在瞬间复活了！
*写到此处，感觉能量真的用光了，必须停下来做一杯热可可，打自我第一次见过他，心中就留下了永不磨灭的印记，无论何时何地，只要想起我的酋长，灼痛的感觉依然存在，看似永远不会消减。*
直至我嘴里尝到泪水的咸味，才算正式从我幻想中的世界回到现实， 此时他们已经脱掉红色斗篷开始唱Dear
Woman 了，我收拾心情定睛看他，他俊俏精致的脸庞，他的一举手一投足，延伸到紧贴在身上的深红色套装，与围在项上的黑色羽毛围巾。这个男人到底是什么构造，怎么可能保持如此完璧无瑕的美丽，美得完全超乎想象，而由这种美释放出来的光芒如闪烁的火花般迅速充斥全场！在此次行程预备过程中，困难一次次出现，好像永远无法达到终点，让我不得不怀疑，這一切到底是为了什么？在看到他的一刹那，所有的疑问都得到解答，只要能再次见到他，为了他，任何的付出都是值得的，不需要任何理由。而此刻我心中的满足扩大再扩大，延伸至永恒。
唱bang bang bang 时，他把头伸到Shingo肩膀上，长发飘飘眼睛闪闪，飞快的亲了Shingo的脸，全场尖叫四起。
他笑着把头缩回来，微微侧歪一下，头发软软的落在肩膀上，美得无以伦比！有时候，我会怀疑，到底是什么元素让他能发出如此璀璨的光芒，多年来，多少年轻的偶像们模仿他的衣着，动态，表情，可他就是有那么一股独特的东西，无人能及。
之后间场的3D影片，狮子的声音是他，让我又跑神几秒想起我的森林酋长。
他们换了服装再次出场，他穿的是七分袖衬衣，里面的白色T-shirt上黄黄绿绿的图案透过外衣的淡蓝色格子表露无遗。下身穿的是浅绿色的裤子，上面印着大黄花，像千里所说的那样，服装本身太普通了，但是穿在他身上却那样的耀眼。
卷卷的长发软软的搭在他肩膀上，映得小脸更瘦也更精致了，不禁轻轻慨叹，年轻人再瞩目脸庞也不过如此了吧！而这样的美貌绝不做他人想，只能属于他！看到如此巧夺天工的容颜，让我感觉下巴有什么重物坠着，不受控制往下掉，本来是想尽量控制自己不要失控的，可看到眼前的这个他呀，让我陷入半疯狂状态！
MC部分开始了，五个人站在台前讲话，真可惜我一句都听不懂， 但正因如此，我可以好好的欣赏他。他一脸甜美的站在Shingo边上，先开始只是暧昧的笑着听别人说，手不时抿下搭在脸上汗湿的碎发，然后他也加入对话，看起来像是几个人在互相调侃，只看见他双手绕在胸前，大声的在笑，这样的笑脸让我完全迷失呀！尔后他们走上了主舞台最上层，背对背坐下唱歌，舞台慢慢的旋转着，他的位置在最右面，将是最后一个面向观众，与Martin商量了一下，两人都认为是最好的时机把专门为他制作，写着他名字的灯牌亮起来。整个演唱会里歌曲的顺序已经不太记得了，当时唯一能做的就是拿望远镜死死的盯着他看。
3D影片再次出现，这次他是个拳击手，由于我一直没有放下望远镜，戴着3D眼镜再加望远镜的效果，他与我的距离是那样的接近，感觉只要伸出手来就能碰到他一样，他的眼睛突然弹了出来，让我大笑不止！
间场过后他们换过衣服，经典的黑色套装出现了，长外衣里面衬着白色镂花衬衣，配着闪亮的皮带扣。当他们单膝跪下亮相的时候，我留意到外衣是半透明的，在长长的黑色外衣下，显得他比实际身材瘦了一圈。强劲的音乐随着他的舞步响起，飘舞着长发的他，看起来跳得那样利落轻松，每个动作都如呼吸一样自然，好像他生下来就会一样（某M禁不住要唠叨一句，台上一分钟台下十年功呀！），挥洒自如这几个字远远不够形容。他强劲有力的舞步透过望远镜稳稳的传向我，离這么远都能感觉到他嘴里呼出的热气与强烈的心跳！实际上此人绝对比他的外表要来得强壮！
SMAP的舞蹈部分是整场的亮点，五个人分开单人，双人，三人舞轮换搭配。而他的性感单人舞让整个会场再次燃烧了，尖叫声在我身边此起彼伏！
2TOP的双人舞，中居在前他在后，先是千手观音的动作，然后他从中居的右边滑出来，开始一段极难的BreakDance
， 以往的演唱会DVD中，见过他跳各种舞蹈，可這种Break Dance 是我头一次见到，快速而漂亮的摇摆加上旋风般的旋转（M按，完全译不出来，大家凑和看吧），已经记不得他准确的动作，有人说是风车，可对我来说更像是直升机或者没有固定支点的旋风多一些。
* Break Dance比其他的流行舞蹈更难跳，它对舞者的各样条件，本身的体力，身体的韧性，柔软度，和谐度，都有着极高的要求，否则根本无法完成*
舞毕他鱼跃起来，甩甩头把粘在脸上横七竖八的头发甩开。这段舞真的是出乎意料—是酋长的自我挑战！他永远会给我们带来惊喜，因为他知道，现场有千万双充满宠爱，赞许的眼睛在看着他，是這无数双眼睛给他力量，让他勇往直前。感谢他为我们付出的努力，拓哉你真棒，而且永远不会失败！
*散场后，Sibi告诉我们，中居在杂志里提到因为他受伤无法跳舞，拓哉必须要把中居的份一起挑起来，這也是中居第一次看到他跳Break
Dance。這，就是他向中居与众多fans表达爱的方式吧。*
下个3D片断完毕，与他们出现的同时，会场飘起了片片雪花，现场下起雪来了。第四套服装是闪亮的蓝色西服，别人在唱歌，他静静地坐在最右面的台阶上，不唱不动的他实在迷人，一脸的梦幻，水蒙蒙的双眼深不见底。他坐在那里朝上方看去，深深吸口气把眼睛闭上，這样的他看起来像个孩子，隐藏了所有的活力与火焰，散发出孩童般独特的神秘。然后他睁开眼睛，垂头往下首看了一会，当他再次抬头，看到嘴角轻轻的牵动着浅浅一笑。
又一个3D出现，这次他穿了件Hikaru款式的松身白色衬衣，他掳了把面前的空气做个Kiss动作，
這些空气变成无数粉红色的心心扑面而来，赶紧伸手抓住！
* 写到Solo之前，我必须吃点东西去，脑子快转不动了。*
Shingo的Solo充满了动力，他是头一个，SMAP里的小弟弟终于成长为大人了。Goro的独唱部分看起来更像个魔术表演，保持一贯的王子气质。最后一场位置比较接近的时候，才看清楚原来是有替身的。
Shingo再次出现，拓哉坐在后面弹着吉他给Shingo唱和声，穿的桔黄色上衣配泛白牛仔裤，眨着他亮亮的大眼睛，沉醉在歌曲里。两人的嗓音融合得很好，听起来是那样的饱满和谐，尤其歌曲的后半部他主音的部分更加宏亮悦耳，伙计们！唱得真好，为你们骄傲！
*Martin， 我也最喜欢慢歌部分，這首歌的时候看到到你脸上挂着泪水，能与你一起欣赏整个演唱会，分享同样的感觉与视角，实在是太好了！*
刚的快板Solo让Dome里很高涨，大家摇着手灯跟着他唱。
终于轮到他的solo了，现场一片漆黑，只剩下打在他身上的一束光柱，那宝石般的眼睛在素白的水银灯照射下，显得更加璀璨耀眼！然后，我听见一把轻柔的声音响起，像是从很远的地方传来，远得如同天外！没人会比他唱得再好了，整个人都沉醉在自己的歌声里，那一定是个美妙绝伦的世界吧。他低低的吟唱，像在轻轻诉说，那个让他迷失的境界，从他的声音里，仿佛见到他稚童般纯真的心，赤裸裸的展示在我面前，犹如初夜柔和而美丽的花朵，在我眼前盛放！歌声如流水般在会场里流淌，起初只是清澈的小溪，渐渐汇聚成浩淼的汪洋，而我的心被这把声音牵引着，上上下下左左右右，时而高昂，时而羞涩，时而怅惘。当晚，尽管有两个高音处他没唱到位（M冒死按曰，是压根没唱出来吧），可这是第一次，被他纤细的，充满了感情的歌声，触摸到我原本埋藏得好好的，心底深处的灵魂！怎么说呢，我绞尽脑汁，挖掘我所知道的全部词汇也无法形容這种奇妙的感觉，勉强可以形容为：——————17岁的我，从来没被亲吻过！撕心裂肺地一声：Takuya！真真是我心中埋藏已久的呐喊！
接下来的几天，他的Solo 越唱越好，可偏偏這场不太完美的，最最打动我！
這一切的一切，如梦境般美好的场景，是那样的不真实，确又明明白白的展示在眼前，幸福的泪水再次夺眶而出。
另一套服装出场了，有点像军装，白色T shirt，橄榄绿外衣，贴身霓彩军裤，配黑色长皮靴。拓哉戴了黑色墨镜，像个挺拔的飞行员！转眼间他甩掉墨镜，来来回回箭般飞快地在舞台上奔驰。他是我见过，唯一能把刚强与优雅揉合于一身的人，两种截然不同的美同时发光发热，血液般自然在他身体里流淌着。人们在欣赏他花儿般娇美容貌的同时，也为他慑人的气势所倾倒，這就是我们的拓哉，轻易吸走你全盘注意力！
后舞台部分，Lucky San们被邀请上台了，其中有个约五岁的小男孩，与大家打过招呼后，拓哉蹲下来，抱起小男孩让他骑在自己脖子上，那张脸笑得好开心呀。他驼着小男孩满后舞台乱窜，好一幅欢快的父子图！而且我注意到，整个过程中，他都一直用手护着孩子以防他摔下来，真是个细心的好爸爸。
然后Lucky San退场，开始唱花了，那么明显感觉到他清亮的大眼睛里，盛载满满地真挚与热情，看见他握拳捶向胸口，再次被泪水模糊了双眼。刹那间觉得与他相知已经很久很久了，像是我认识自己般长久；然后恍然大悟，我对他的爱，并非瞬间的头脑发热，而是长期的煎熬，爱的煎熬！类似的感觉，我无数次梦境里见到过，也曾经试图在现实生活中寻找，但当时就有所觉悟，可能要等很久才能找到，起码比我预想得长久。
我的眼睛一直没有离开过他，有时他被舞台布景或者是灯架完全遮挡，我仍然会努力的找寻他的位置，哪怕只是他的背影或者一片衣角都不会放过。当灯光没有打到他的时候，我尽力让自己的视力也适应黑暗，在黑暗里寻找他的身影，就算只能盯着的他的影子也是美妙的感觉。整场就这样目不转睛的盯着他看，实在对另外四位Smap成员感到愧疚，可我真的无法把眼光从他身上移开。不过我答应你们，一定会在今年的DVD里把你们们挨个好好看过来。
放烟花的时候，拓哉的眼睛更加闪亮了，那水晶般闪亮的眸子，轻易地让我再次迷失，使我的灵魂离开了身体随着烟花一起飞舞。
所有的舞蹈人员手拉手并排站在台上，开始谢幕了！他脸上充满了演出成功的喜悦与自豪，信心满满的向着各个方向观众鞠躬，敬礼，坐得这么大老远都能感觉他有多兴奋，情绪高涨到了极点。整个场馆都是尖叫声，大家呼喊着他们的名字，而拓哉看似很喜欢这一切，尽情享受着来自观众的欢呼！那张脸笑得犹如清晨刚刚盛开的向日葵。
Encore开始了，浑身被汗水湿透的他看起来是那样的雀跃，一定对今天的演出很满意吧。他摇着一头长发甩汗的模样真好看，无可言喻的美丽，活脱脱是个童话故事里走出来的天使！这样的他美得让我窒息，好几次盯着他看而忘记呼吸，差点没把自己憋死。
Encore到最后，他们五个人站在主舞台准备最后退场，他人已经走到退场的小门，紧握拳头高高举起，回眸欣然一笑，这是当晚他留给我最后的影像。
散场后，五个人在Dome外面会合，虽然身上的汗水被大阪微凉的空气吹干，可耳边依然能听到自己因兴奋而无法平静，心脏急速跳动的声音。仰头看天，漆黑的夜空几颗星星静静地闪烁着。没一个人愿意说起刚才的一切，可我知道大家都在心里默默的回味着。
随着退场的人潮坐地铁回酒店，几个人的大脑终于反应到肚子依然空空如也。路上商量着待会吃什么，这商量的过程，使我们从刚才演唱会的震撼中稍微回过点神来。随后在酒店附近找到一间小店，是那种卖简单定食的小铺子，满嘴充斥着美味牛肉盖饭的我，边吃边与大家商量第二天的日程，感觉这是我平生吃过的最美味的饭了！
回到房间里，靠在床上伸个懒腰，演唱会中绝美的身影，鲜明地在我脑中回放，毫无睡意的我跑去把窗帘打开，点点繁星映入眼帘，而他的脸就在夜空中闪着绚烂的光芒，一股莫名酸楚从心中陡然涌出；冲回去躺在床上让泪水任意流淌，千里，亲爱的，对不起吓到你了，可是当晚他带给我的震感让我完全控制不了自己，Sorry
！
第二天早上起来，决定必须想办法控制一下自己，否则下面几场可怎么得了。虽然身体依然酸痛着，心里莫名其妙地燃起失落感，好像整个人的记忆被掏空了一样，脑子里一片空白。尝试回想昨晚发生的一切，可是唯一能够捕捉的，只剩下扇子上那张笑脸。
吃过早饭我们到大阪城里愉快的游览。*Sibi，你的SMAP制服真酷，如果我比现在瘦20公斤，也会穿成那样当你的队友*
中午的时候我与阿加莎去了逛厨房用具，一套美观实用的厨具让我爱不释手* 阿加莎，谢谢你让我冷静下来，拯救了我的钱包。你是最棒的购物伴侣*
与昨天差不多时间到达会场，今天的位置与昨天类似，但靠前了几排并靠右一些，依然是Martin-
Nadine 二人组。今天心不在焉的情况相对昨天来说有所改善（M按，我奶奶，心不在焉都哭成这样，在了焉可怎么得了），起码没用太多的时间幻想，喊他的名字也比昨天多了些。
当天晚上，有个场景让我无法忘怀，我将要描述的一切很可能只是我的幻觉，可这个幻觉在当晚足以使我整个心灵完全抽缩，依稀记得那瞬间燃亮我生命的狂喜。。。。
在他们背对背坐下唱星空下的时候，我与Martin举起了写着拓哉二字的灯牌，当然我们希望他能看到，就算只有一次也好。当他的位子慢慢转过来面向观众的时候，中间的几秒钟，明亮的大眼睛忽闪忽闪的朝我们这边定睛看来，那眼神美得让我们心跳都要停止了呀，一定有什么东西吸引了他，因为他的眼睛在瞬间睁得更大了。是我们的灯牌引起他注意了吗？一想到这个[可能性]，心立马提到了嗓子眼。只见他微微点了点头，举起手做成个半圆型在自己眼前转了转，像是要表示什么，随即一个大大的笑容在他脸上绽开！由于震惊过渡，心中完全失去平衡的我无法相信亲眼所见的事实，这一切发生得太快了，只剩下半信半疑地琢磨这到底是不是真的。待他转过之后，我的大脑与思维使尽了全力试图回想这一瞬间。我的理智告诉我那不可能是真的，因为我们离他的视线范围还有很远，可仍然相信自己的记忆，他确实是看到了！我想，我一定是疯了吧！
激动不已的我，拽着Martin的肩膀告诉她我看到的一切，她发出一阵欢呼并问我何时发生的，为了要解答她的疑问，我必须再次确定自己，然后告诉她，“几秒钟前”，再试图解释他的动作表情，点头是告诉我们他看到灯牌了，半圆的手势是要说“你们在用望远镜”。这番话引起Martin
又一阵欢呼！稍候姐妹们告诉我，我们的位置与舞台的距离很远，远到肉眼，就算锐利如老鹰的眼睛，也无法清楚的看到。或许他看的是与我们同一个方向但距离比较接近的人，举着他的扇子，在用望远镜看他，因而吸引了他的注意吧。。。。。。听过这百分百理智的分析，我也开始怀疑自己是否看错了，但我宁愿选择相信自己的[幻觉]，
因为，这[幻觉]带给我的感觉实在太美妙了！
当晚无数次与其他fan一起呼喊他的名字，叫得如此响亮过瘾（M按，嗯，声音亮，嗓子穿透力强的Nadine，叫起来一定很好听^^）。多年来一直以安静有礼为根本的我，面对他时来个大逆转，而这个逆转将永远在我心里住下，成为密不可分的另一个我。
9月22日，又是一个艳阳天。中午与千里可爱的朋友一起吃了美味丰盛的烧烤料理，在Nihonbashi（某M实在懒得查地名了，大家包涵）给家人和朋友买礼物，我以相当不错的价钱买到Edward与Alphonse的模型……。下午，我们回到那个熟悉的地方，这次Sibi
，Martin 与我三人坐一起，队伍越来越壮大了呵呵。
这场的MC 比前两天要来得长，中间Shingo的话筒没了声音，拓哉跑过去帮他检查……。虽然这场没什么特别事情发生，可我还是非常享受这整个过程。前两天的演唱会于我来说，像是个梦境多一些，因而并没有完全投入，可今天看见他，终于有了真实感，知道自己也是这场盛会的其中一员。时间在我一点都没有察觉的情况下飞逝，他的每一个笑脸带给我的快乐是那样的纯粹彻底！
按照原定计划，23号最后一天演唱会的白天，我们是打算一早去Nara 或者Kobe游览的。可太多的选择就等于没有选择，尤其是我们最后一场演唱会的战略决定以后，惊觉我们只剩下唯一一个选择，准备演唱会的行头！
星期六一早（9月23日），千里和我到百元商店采购。在两小时内把所有需要的东西都置办齐备，甚至买到更多的原料发挥创意！
匆匆赶回酒店，与Sibi 阿加莎一起开始美工劳作，等弄好刚刚到点，果然是高效率！
知道这是此次最后一次见他了，听取了Mini的建议，穿上突出胸部的内衣与性感上衣，再换上高跟鞋，闹得跟上战场没啥区别了，一切准备就绪，尽我所能储备好所有能量作战！今天我们坐的是Arena
D7四连番！一定要尽情享受！
四人到了会场找到位子，立刻把预备好的饰物拿出来开始打扮自己，其实这套行头并不复杂，确是那样的闪亮—
三个一套的荧光纸手环套在左手手腕上，大红花别在头上—Dear Women 造型！手里的扇子则用金色与红色的荧光彩纸点缀起来。
开场前我留意到两个日本Fan穿着非常抢眼，绿色上衣，绿色超短裙，头戴绿花，手上拿着拓哉字样的绿色扇子，连她们的T-Shirt上都印有拓哉头像与1113几个数字。
这是最后一次了，看到他的每一分钟都无比珍贵，看着他精巧的脸与脸上每一个细致的表情变化，仿佛把整个Dome的空气微妙地融合，形成一种奇异的气氛！对于此场的Arena
，我们并没有期待多大的幸运，只是想好好的看他。 决定不错失任何机会好好享受他带给我的幸福时光。
今天的位置真的太棒了，视角一流，能把他看得一清二楚。很多前两天坐Stand没有留意到的细节，都在今天补足了：
他强而有力的舞蹈，连被服装遮盖住的，身上肌肉的跳动都能透过肉眼一览无遗；
一头轻柔的长发随着他节奏感极强的舞步摇曳（对我来说，他的舞步节奏感之强早就不是什么新鲜事，可這样近距离的看到还是被深深震撼了！）；
他躲在Shingo身后孩子般灿烂的笑脸，他搭着刚的肩膀害羞的样子；
他与队友对视时眼神中的胸有成竹；
两个舞蹈演员出现在左右，他露出一口洁白牙齿的欢颜 ；
背靠台阶坐着时凝视远方梦幻的眼神，丰厚的嘴唇微微抖动，像是在说着什么；
他伸出舌头舔嘴唇的样子；
经过长时间舞动而浑身湿透的他，边喘着粗气边喝水，然后举起水壶往头上浇，再使劲摇晃脑袋甩掉汗与水，像极了可爱的小汪汪，湿漉漉的头发粘在头颈上，这个汗宝宝实在太过美好，美得轻易地让人迷失；
Encore 后，他穿着那身既可爱又火辣的军绿色上衣霓彩裤子再次出场，然后在最后退场的时候，眼看着他把手放在中居的臀部帮助受伤的队友爬上楼梯；
他用嘴型跟观众说再见，说谢谢，同时坚定地举起右手，攥成拳头用力地 举高。。。。。。
他是天神最钟爱的孩子，赐予他一个人类梦寐以求的一切，坚强的意志，无法抗拒的魅力，让他有能力飞翔至无穷无尽的天际！
因为想扑捉他在台上的每一个动作每一个表情，直到眼睛开始酸疼才发现，已经好久没有眨过眼了。此景此景令我灵魂出鞘热血沸腾，以致听觉完全失灵，唯一能听到的，只有自己咚咚的心跳声。但愿我能把这让我燃烧殆尽的一刻延长再延长。最后的退场，他已经离开了视线范围，我希望--甚至祈求—他会再次出现。。。。。。喊着他的名字。。。。。。
重复又重复的问自己当时到底什么感觉，企图永远记住那一刹那。可实在无法形容这种心情，一种无以名之的感觉。可能这种感觉没人能准确的形容出来吧，当你见过他之后，一切的文字与词汇都变得苍白失色。
当晚是那样的完美！享受它带给我的每秒每刻，从不后悔我为此行而付出的一切。想到为这个梦想，我与我的同伴们永不放弃地努力再努力，加油再加油，直到今天，我可以非常自豪的说：这个美梦终于成真了！（对于当地人来说，来這里看他一次是十分简单的事，可对我们姐几个来说，几乎是个不可完成的任务呀，所以，我们以此为荣！）
步出会场，微微感到一丝秋凉了。四个人都已经筋疲力尽，刚刚在Dome里的几小时，我们罄尽了所有的能量与热情，已经远远超出了负荷
。与千里去转了一趟卖周边的摊位，可是拓哉的所有周边都已经卖光了。失望的同时也为他高兴，这个33岁，已婚还当了两个孩子他爸的男人，依然是最受欢迎的！
拖着沉重的脚步与空空如也的肚子，大家心里都无限失落，于是，一致决定去干点什么让自己开心起来的事---吃晚饭！
回到酒店，根本无法入眠，尝试写点什么，可一个字都写不出来，这意义非凡的四天带给我的一切，深埋心底，深得无法形容。回想起过去一年所经历的，酸楚而艰难的日子，残酷的现实几乎把我击至完全崩溃，最灰暗的日子里，身心都跌至谷底的我，浑忘快乐为何物。可上天并没有完全舍弃我，经由我可爱的同伴们相助，让我冲破重重困难来到大阪，用这个火热的演唱会季节，来温暖这颗冰封的心灵。使我尝到生命中从未有过的甘甜，让我明白世上最大的安慰就是拥有梦想与希望。这个神牵梦系的他，燃亮了我的生命，生活因为有他而变得美好。曾多次问过自己，为何会追随他，终于找到答案了—他所具备的所能做到的一切，都是我需要确无法具备更无法做到的。
卒之到了没有演唱会的日子。我们到京都去，享受了一整天当地清爽的秋色和两顿丰盛的大餐（M按，这帮人，真能吃）。返回大阪的时候已经是晚上了，清澈的夜空下漫步在大阪街头，秋天到了，一到晚上就开始凉起来。
然后我们上了摩天轮欣赏大阪的夜色。猛然间意识到明天一早我们就要离开了这一事实，突如其来的失落感，瞬间像是把我掏空了一样，情不自禁的叫起他的名字来。身旁的Sibi与阿加莎开始静静的饮泣。我把脸朝外趴在窗户边，心中有什么东西在隐隐作痛，尽量让自己不要去想他。于是，我与千里试着说些笑话活跃一下气氛。此时，大阪的微风也变得潮湿起来。
第二天早上，我们拖着沉重的行李走向地铁站，途中经过我们第一天看到有贴他咖啡广告的贩卖饮料机。看到这张脸，像是有把尖刀划过，从心脏而至胃部然后慢慢传到指尖，甚至脚下。。。。。人生可能就是如此吧，总是：相聚--别离-再相聚—再别离。
写这篇报告让我筋疲力尽，或许，是因为所有的记忆都是从灵魂深处生拽出来的缘故吧。
而我记忆中的苦涩与酸楚，都让泪水冲洗得干干净净，06年演唱会给我留下的只有数不尽甘甜，世上没有任何东西能比的甜美。
我带去大阪的背包有一条金属带子，再装上东西变得沉重无比，恨不得把我肩膀都压肿了。当时不止一次的抱怨过它的沉重，可是现在，我确怀念起包中的重量来。
这个男人是个怪物，他能带给所有人勇气与能量，无时无刻的让人感到新奇，无止境的让你惊喜。而演唱会上那个闪亮而温暖的他令我无比的享受兼回味无穷。而他独有的才能让我平凡的人生也变得丰富多彩起来。
在此我要感谢大家对我的帮助，没有你们，我决不可能完成这次旅程：
感谢Tiya 借给我望远镜，你说得对，它带给我从未有过清晰的视线。
感谢Mini催促我完成这份报告（M按，是呀，催你倒是很积极，翻译拖了这么久，Sorry），回顾这些快乐而珍贵的记忆感觉太棒了，等于重新经历了一次当时的一切，有了它，记忆可以永远保鲜呢。
最后向我亲爱的伙伴们说几句：
Sibi—我们真正的领导，
阿加莎—我们的精神指导，
千里—我们的天使，
Martin—我们的心灵药箱，有了你们的陪伴，
跟你们拥有同样的记忆实在太棒了！！我爱你！
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